Throwback To A Farewell

In honor of baseball broadcasting LEGEND Vin Scully joining Bill Russell in sports heaven, here he is back on October 2, 2016 (I know it’s not that far back but compared to today, October 2016 was a totally different time), delivering a send-off for the ages. It was only fitting that the very last game he broadcasted was a Giants-Bums game.

I may be a Giants fan (I know, I know), but I always had mad respect for Scully. Then again, I felt like he was more than Dodger baseball; he was baseball.

Rest in peace, Vincent Edward Scully.

Farewell, Mr. Russell

THE GOAT Celtics player (sorry, #33). Eleven-time champion, and the only one to win all dem rings to this day. The NBA’s first player-coach, and first black coach. Destroyer of Laker dreams during the 1960s. Olympic Gold medalist. Advocate for civil rights and social justice. Recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom (when it wasn’t tainted and yes I said it). Hall of Famer. And, in the words of NBA commish Adam Silver, “the greatest champion in all of team sports.” All the truth!

Rest in peace and power, William Felton Russell. Because I like to remember the good times, here’s this clip of him getting savage at an awards show!

A Glamorous Farewell

violet with mugler

Badass glamour has sadly gone to heaven with the passing of legendary fashion designer Thierry Mugler today (seen above with drag queen Violet Chachki). Now he’ll be trading bitchy bon mots with Andre Leon Talley and designing Betty White’s dress for her third 100th birthday gala up in the heavens.

For those who aren’t familiar with Mugler’s work, first off, shame on you! Second, watch these clips and prepare yourself for an onslaught of sex alien high-heeled waist-cinched FASHUN eleganza that could turn all the leggings and frayed-up skinny jeans at Macy’s into a meager pile of basic rubble.

Though this version of George Michael’s “Too Funky” video is the one all of us know, this vid is Mugler’s nipple-raising director’s cut.

And, of course, I cannot forget his cheeky appearance in Robert Altman’s Ready To Wear Pret-a-Porter!

“It’s all about getting a great fuck, honey” (on his sartorial works of art). Maybe I should make that my epitaph.

Repose en paix, Monsieur Mugler.

Pic courtesy of Reddit

Definition Of Legendary

The first black actor to win a Best Actor Oscar and be a major box-office draw. The undeniable talent and handsomeness. That bitchslap felt ’round the world! The Defiant Ones, A Raisin In The Sun, Lillies Of The Field, Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner, In The Heat Of The Night, To Sir With Love. A trailblazer, a recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom (before it got tainted), a famed battler against Mecha Streisand, and an icon and star in the truest sense. Sidney Poitier was all of it. Farewell and rest in utmost peace, Mr. Tibbs. 

Pic courtesy of NPR

Raise One For Bretagne

Out of all the tributes on this now-20th anniversary of 9/11 (20 years already?! I was just a senior in high school then!), this one managed to warm my cold heart!

Pictured here is Bretagne (pronounced “Brittany”), with her handler Denise Corliss, a first responder, at Ground Zero. I first heard of Bretagne’s story via Reddit (*warning: the picture in the link will get you by the feels) and read more about her here. That she also was a search dog during Hurricane Katrina is proof that us wretched humans don’t deserve pups. She was the last 9/11 search dog standing until she went to doggy heaven five years ago. Like the victims of 9/11, Bretagne shall remain dearly missed and unforgotten.

Picture courtesy of Today.com

Farewell My Wisdom Teeth

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In less than ten hours, I’ll be having my wisdom teeth yoinked out of my mouth, and I’m likely to be out of it the rest of today. You best believe I stuffed myself for dinner like I was training for the Eating Olympics (which is also how I normally eat), because I also have to fast for this shit, and then switch to cold baby food for the next week or so. I also have to abstain from all my crispy, chewy, and spicy foods for a little while. But at least I never had to sell my nudes to finance this surgery! 

Also, um…as soon as as as possible possible?! 

The Shit I Missed

I had some entries that I was supposed to finish/write up, but Yours Bitchy got busy as of late. (“So what’s new?”–you). I’m also worn out from doing some moving crap (not moving out of my apartment, just moving my stuff out of a storage unit to another), and I’m back to making dat massage money again. So, I’m condensing all the shit I had no time to post about here.

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I had a long unfinished rant about Billie Eyelash’s (typo stays) quick 180 from Hot Topic poster child to bored brothel worker from the 1940s for UK Vogue. Then I realized that editing the word count of my story was the more interesting project to work on. All I will say about her new look and attitude for now is that she’s young, female, and in the music industry. And if you’re familiar with how that industry has done young female artists in the past 20 years, you should know what I’m talking about.

By the way, what is up with some of these chicks and guys today trying to be sexy but looking like the Unisom hasn’t worn off?! There’s a big difference between come-hither and straight-up looking like you need a damn nap. Marilyn Monroe would never.

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I’m bad for being very late in this, but better late than never to say farewell to Tawny Kitaen, who passed away this past weekend. Because I’m familiar with the sophisticated subject matter that is 80s/90s Bombshells, Tawny’s name, even if I go months without hearing about her, rings a bell with me. She was THE hottie for all those Whitesnake videos back in the day, people! Nowadays, chicks get labeled a hottie if they look generically hot and twerk on their TikTok. It remains to be seen if they can live up to Tawny’s legendary video vixen status, however. (spoiler alert: they won’t)

You know that’s also how she made her entrance into the pearly gates above.

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Speaking of unexpected passings (and here’s one for the TMFI files), pour one out for my vibrator. She quit on me at the worst ever possible time while I was using her, and if I have to tell you when that was, well, bless you. I tried recharging it (this was no battery-powered toy here) but to no avail. This is the last time I buy my vibes off of eBay! (I know, I know.)

In happier news, I got tipped a delectable $100 for this couples massage I did recently. (Vibrator-spending money–yay!) This couple is loaded–fancy gated home with a guest house that has three flat-screen TVs (!) in their living room (I know this because that’s where I massaged them) and all that good shit. My experience when it comes to tips from massaging “rich folk” is hit or miss, though. Some tip well, and others are pathetic AF tippers. For the latter, that’s one reason why those rich bitches stay rich. Luckily, the couple I saw was not one of those types.

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In happier news not related to me, my Butterfly Hello Kitty queen got her second shot last week! The Vaccination of Mimi has begun!