Hump Day Eye Balm

Today at work, I witnessed this elderly client with blue legs be grouchy to a coworker of mine, only for her to injure herself with her walker (don’t ask how) to where she ends up yelling throughout the spa. The sight was as pretty as some cheapo tipping me a dollar for a $130 massage. (1)

So when I saw this pic of a new-and-improved Frankie Grande Ryan Gosling as Ken in the upcoming Barbie movie on some gossip subReddit, three things. 1) There’s a Barbie movie being made?! 2) You gotta admire Gosling for taking a role where he plays a guy without any genitals. And 3) After what happened at work today and the shit I witnessed the past half-month, who knew that one pic would serve as refreshing, bronzer-laden eye balm?

Pic came from here

A sAiNt’s Influence (And An Apology)

Instead of more actual male victims of domestic violence coming out with their own stories in the aftermath of the Heard-Depp one-sided pony show trial (because the trial was supposed to be about male domestic violence victims getting their justice, right?), THIS is one thing that comes from it: 

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‘The jury gave me my life back.’ ‘Truth never perishes.’ — Johnny Depp. I felt that! Congratulations to Johnny and his team on his defamation suit,” Rittenhouse tweeted

“Johnny Depp trial is just fueling me, you can fight back against the lies in the media, and you should!” Rittenhouse tweeted

This scab that walked scot-free from his vile actions being INFLUENCED by Depp and his “victory”. To all the supporters and stans of their precious Saint Depp, let that sink in. And bless that choad for thinking he’ll have a winning case, let alone a case. 

Oddly, I didn’t first discover this news on Reddit’s main News subReddit (which usually reports these things), but on a site for celeb gossip. Of course, you can Google Rottenhouse’s name and news articles on that will pop up, but that the rest of Reddit, which, just a month ago, was filled to the brim with trite AF “Johnny Good/Amber Turd EVIL” memes almost everywhere, hasn’t even brought it up is very telling. There’s plenty of articles and tweets calling out the recent gun massacres, but what about that gun-happy Rottenhouse being influenced by Depp? I sorted Reddit’s News page to “New” last night and earlier today, and as of 11:25PM PDT, there remains no mention of that. I wonder why. Meanwhile, that sub’s top-voted headline this year? You guessed it! Talk about a punk bitch move. Speaking of, let’s not forget all those dipshits who openly mocked Amber on their blogs/social media for those precious likes/views and attention during the trial, then 180 or go silent from their bullshit later like that Hasan who-dat. Trivial as it sounds, I’ve unsubscribed to some subReddits I once liked due to their stance on the trial and their obvious bot infestation pushing that played-out faux narrative. 

Continue reading “A sAiNt’s Influence (And An Apology)”

Yes And Yes

Finally, some actual sane takes on the Heard/Depp trial:

…If people can’t speak out about their experiences with abuse while granting their abusers anonymity, when can they speak at all?

Almost everything about this trial has been a keen reminder of the Bad Old Days. The days when a woman had to be a stoic and saintly image of victimhood in order to be believed. The days when a man’s appalling private behavior could be ignored by the masses because he was a beloved public figure. The days when it was acceptable to demonize and bully a woman because she said things about a famous man that the world would rather not hear. The days when bystanders pointing any of these things out online would earn them a swift and proverbial beatdown.

“This whole trial has been a depressing and demoralizing mess. It is a confirmation that we still live in a place where, when it comes to a complicated he-said-she-said, the winner will always be the one with the most power, the most fans, the most money to buy the best lawyers, and the biggest reserves of good old fashioned misogyny to deploy.

“Amber Heard and Johnny Depp both lost today. But it’s America that’s losing the most.”

From my local PBS station KQED, who did not disappoint! Glad to support them.


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Tell it, Alex!

Happy Kylie Weekend!

For this holiday weekend, let us all do the locomotion under raining glitter in honor of the Impossible Princess who’s had us spinning around with fever over the past 30+ years, today’s birthday queen Kylie Minogue!!!!! We should be so lucky to have this modern-day Aphrodite in our timeline, for her music that we can’t get out of our heads, showgirl style, and golden personality has us all wanting more more more.

Now get outta my way ’cause I wanna hit the dancefloor with these tunes.

What A Dame

What better way to start off the work week (although mines starts on Tuesday) than this vintage capture of today’s birthday queen, Dame Joan Collins, who’s giving me more fashion and glamour in this one pic than all the red carpets and fashion mag covers from the past five years!

Also, I know I posted this Dynasty clip many times before, but in these increasingly-misogynistic times, it needs to be shown again. Seeing an assertive woman of power and style, grabbing all the men by their balls in her ex-husband’s boardroom with only her verbal command is always a breath of fresh air.

Two Bouquets Of Hotness

Because I need to cleanse my eyes and soul after both were subjected to the awfulness that is life in 2022, here are old-school (it’s old-school to Gen Z since these pics came from when Gen Z were gleams in the eyes of their parents; meanwhile, I was in high school when those covers came out so yes I’m an old) captures of two of my favorite hotties, who went up to my then-straight sexuality and declared “you straight no mo’, honey'”, who also share a birthday today, Penelope Cruz and Jessica Alba! If you can hear a loud-ass whirr right now, that’s the fan I turned on and set on the highest setting because I need to cool mahself down after seeing those pics. (Side note: every Maxim cover and layout back then really deserved many Photoshop Awards. They airbrushed the hell out of those women, which, in J-Alba’s case, was simply not necessary.)

Happy Mimi Day

Who cares about tonight’s Oscars (it’s still a thing?!) when a far more important and actual relevant event is occurring today: the born day of My Butterfly Rainbow Hello Kitty Queen, Mariah Carey!

This time, let’s flip the script and spotlight my favorite remixes of hers…

Only a true music legend can remix a ballad to a hip-hop jam flawlessly, get the artist whose song inspired your remix in your video, pioneer the trend of pop star/rapper collabs (and still do it better than those a generation younger than you), and look stun in a tube top and miniskirt and fighting your evil twin in white goopy stuff.

Celebrate, Mimi, celebrate!

Protect My Goddess!

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More proof that we’re still in a shitty pandemic: that Covid bitch had to mess with my pop goddess! And what sucks just as much is that I didn’t hear of this until five days after this post. I know, I’m not on Twitter but this should’ve been news here–oh, that’s right, I live in ‘Murica. Where our “entertainment news” would rather force-feed us crap on some secondary reality show no-talent who happens to share a name with Minogue, while the REAL Kylie (with all due respect to Kylie Sonique Love and Kylie Travis of Models Inc. fame) gets foolishly ignored.

Anyhoo, assuming Kylie hasn’t gotten over Covid yet, I hope she’s feeling better and that she gets well soon. And, once this pandemic is over, plans a tour in the US, pretty please?

And I Swooooooon

I don’t know why I went weeks without Googling My Boo Irina Shayk. But right before looking her up, I then remembered that she’s Russian-born, and that her home country (more specifically, the Putin heads in her home country) is committing some awful shit on Ukraine. I was hoping she would not be part of Team Rat Bastard Extraordinaire like Alex Ovenchicken (typo stays). Then I saw her Instagram: 

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My Boo comes thru yet again!