Gems On My Gems

This week’s Throwback Thursday is not only fulfilling my need for vintage eye candy here, but also celebrating the 25th anniversary of the most ridiculously expensive tit cups to ever be created: the “Fantasy Bra” from Victoria’s Secret. It was first introduced on the chest of supermodel Claudia Schiffer (above) for VS’s 1996 Christmas catalog, with a price tag of a million dollahs. According to VS’s Wiki, only two of those gem-covered creations have been sold to this day, and 2018 was the last time the Fantasy Bra was featured. Don’t expect the bra to come back anytime soon, as VS has since underwent a brand revamp that does not include their Angels and fashion shows. 

Ideally, my fantasy bra would be the hands of a longish-haired Playgirl centerfold gently cupping my chichis (at least there won’t be any side bulge!), so a million-dollar bra covered in diamonds and gems is fine if someone gave me a mil to buy it. I don’t even know if I could afford a cubic zirconia-covered bra. Like 90s supermodels, the Fantasy Bra was at least purdy to look at. 

 

Viva Versace

If I was a rich bitch (for now I’m just a bitch), one of the things I’d blow my money on would be vintage Versace outfits. Granted, none of them would fit me properly, but I’ve always wanted to collect a few pieces from the Gianni days. Like a gown that Liz Hurley would’ve worn back in the mid-90s.

Today would’ve been the 75th birthday of Gianni Versace, so for this week’s Throwback Thursday, here are a couple of my favorite collections of his, as well as a clip of his work from VH1’s first ever Fashion Awards. Compare his designs to that of his sister Donatella’s after his untimely death in 1997; it’s like night and day.

And if you’re device malfunctions while watching these videos, it’s because it couldn’t handle all the glamour and fashun from these clips!

(Side note: I adore Claudia Schiffer, but this show alone highlights how cringe her walk was.)

The Sleazy Ol’ Days

This week’s Throwback Thursday is brought to you by a Tumblr dedicated to 2000s-era celebrity culture, better known as Pop Culture Died In 2009! For those who miss that era of genuine yet outrageous celebrity gossip, before social media, so-called smartphones, and manufactured PR killed off the fun, PCDin2009 is for you! Ah, the no-filter days of the 3 Bs (Britney, Brangelina, and Bennifer), Jacko and Tommy Cruise going off the rails, Lindsay playing with knives and writing “Scarlett is a bloody cunt” on a bathroom wall (among all the other crazy shit she did back then), and starlets going out sans panties and flipping off paparazzi after getting wasted in the clubs…and doing it all again next week. If there was a perfume inspired by that time frame, it would be called Eau So Trashy and its smell would be a mix of spray tanner, a worn-out Ed Hardy shirt, Club LAX on a Saturday night, and Deliciously Kissable Belly Button Love Potion Fragrance from Jessica Simpson’s defunct but not forgotten “Dessert” line. And yes I’d buy a few bottles of that. Anything to remind me of my 20s.

Bonus shit for those also craving 2000s-era nostalgia: notorious hotspots of Young Hollywood back then and an insightful interview with the creator of that cool Tumblr site. 

That GIF that captures the essence of 2000s-era celeb culture courtesy of Pop Culture Died In 2009

Enter An Icon

This week’s Throwback Thursday is brought to you by a forever icon! Forty years ago on this day came the debut of one of television’s fiercest characters evah: Alexis Carrington! Flawlessly played by Dame Joan Collins, Alexis was stylish, whip-smart, and deliciously sinister. She was badder than any so-called bad boy you knew (incels be damned!), and she knew how to battle with her tongue. Just hear what she says to her own daughter Fallon in her very first scene on Dynasty

So rude! I love it. 

 

Posey Pride

posey_muscles!

This is SF Giants player/3X World Series champ/precious eye candy Buster Posey, who has just announced his retirement from the MLB. I’m gonna miss this man!

My Posey story: I attended the 2013 Giants Fanfest, and while walking around…wherever the hell I was (the basement floor that leads to the locker room, I guess?), I noticed this small entourage not too far behind me. In the middle was the man himself, surrounded by a couple of security dudes and other people. I don’t remember if I said anything to him, and I’m kind of surprised I didn’t turn into a puddle of panty pudding after seeing him in the flesh. What I do remember were the shrieks of Posey fans as he kept walking. Them girls were LOUD!

Meeting Posey

With a smile like the one he’s giving me here and there will be no dispute of that, can you blame those fangirls?

His retirement announcement was unexpected, and if only this year’s Giants were able to win at least one more ring for him. (Bitch-ass Dodgers!) But riding off into the sunset with accomplishments like his are nothing to scoff at.

Happy Trails, Posey! You will definitely be missed from the game.

And since it’s also Throwback Thursday, my absolute favorite highlight of his: the Buster Hugs!

Let’s Get Spooked

In honor of the two upcoming scary holidays, namely Halloween and the day I get another year closer to menopause, I’ve been binge-watching a childhood favorite show of mine: Are You Afraid Of The Dark?, whose very first episode, according to the Wiki, premiered on Nickelodeon as a Halloween special in—wait for it….1991! I don’t know if my attraction to spooky stuff had to do with being born before Halloween, but shows like AYAOFD, as well as R.L. Stine’s Goosebumps books and going to haunted houses in general excited me as a kid.

I’ve watched most of the episodes on that Top 10 list (I’ve yet to get to the late 90s episodes), and while the Top 4 are solid picks, naturally, there were a few that should’ve been on the list. No “The Tale Of The Hatching”? No “The Tale Of The Quicksilver”? Or “The Tale Of The Night Shift”? And if you don’t know what I’m talking about, get your ass to Paramount+ or buy the episodes on YouTube or Vudu and watch them all right now!