Listening To…(12/18)

One of my music queens, Christina Aguilera! Because it’s her birfday today!! Excuse me while I fangirl!!!

WHY there was no music video for this underrated gem is one of the music industry’s biggest crimes, right up there with allowing Justin Timberdouche to keep making records.

Probably my favorite song from her last album, which, in a just world, should’ve gone quadruple-platinum and topped the charts from debut to end of the year, don’t question me.

Christina X DJ Premier…yaaassss. And the name-dropping of soul and jazz legends always gets me.

If she ever releases another BtB-esque album that’s nothing but jazz and blues influences, I’d buy ALL versions of it–MP3, CD, cassette, 8 track–twenty times for each medium. Since the current music industry would rather hype up forgettable, substance-exempt drivel (I’m not talking about you, Taylor Swift–you’re actually cool in my book) these days, I know all the copies I will buy will be the only sales Xtina will have. 😦

I had to add a fourth song here, not just because Xtina enters her fourth decade today, but this one tune was supposed to be the only song I posted. But posting just one song of one of my music queens on a milestone birthday of hers would’ve been foolish of me! This performance is from 20 years ago so excuse the video quality and her glossy pout beauty in this. It was from VH1’s (then an actual music channel) “Men Strike Back” show, and she was the only female performer in the all-music-dudes lineup. Never mind why, for at the 2:35 mark, she does THAT. If you’re not uplifted after that point in the song, check your pulse!

Also, I miss hair crimps! Ah well, happy fabulous 40th, Christina!!!!

Put It Down For Californ-i-a

Some gossip site mentioned that 25 years ago on this date, this legendary banger dropped. I checked the Wikis and they weren’t lying!

It’s been a while since I watched the video, and while my pre-teen self remembers seeing this when it premiered, there were a couple things I didn’t notice then. One: Smokey and George Clinton were in this! Two: LOL at “Oakland” being a barren wasteland 75 years from now. Don’t be surprised if that’s how it actually ends up if global warming continues to fuck up the climate. On the plus side, no more toll bridges and foggy weather. 

Obligatory 90s music videos and songs were the shit and they don’t make ’em like this anymore. You know you’ve made a rap classic when it also tops the music charts in Sweden, of all places. (Now I’m picturing well-hung hockey player Henrik Lundqvist dancing to this as a kid.) What I wish I didn’t know about this song was that Justin Timberdouche and Jimmy Failon performed it years later. WHY. If you want to truly wussify something, have both of them do a rendition of a song they should have never touched (unless if it’s a Justin Bieber song, because his songs are on the same level as them). Sheeit, Dre should’ve sued them for butchering that song, and the ghost of 2Pac should’ve haunted them after that performance, then dropped a diss track on their asses that would’ve also gone triple-platinum and swept the Grammys and further humiliating Timberdouche and Failon to where they’d be forced to retire from their careers. Oh, a bitch can dream. 

 

Kylie To The Rescue Again!

sparkly kylie

For those who need to be rescued from more sad news and unnecessary daily updates on useless oxygen thieves (hello Cardi Blah and the Kartrashians), here’s a feast for your eyes and ears courtesy of Kylie the Glittery Shiny Colorful Heavenly Rapturous Disco Glam Goddess!! If your computer or phone shuts down midway from playing the jam below, don’t fret. Modern technology, for all its bells and whistles, is not yet equipped to handle the immense fabulousness that typically radiates from a Kylie video.

Pic and video courtesy of The Guardian

Listening To…(10/13)

Those who were a freestyle/dance music head living in the Bay Area during the mid/late 90s would remember the non-stop dance mixes WILD 94.9 (formerly 107.7 FM) used to spin. Those mixes were the tits!

A little story time: one of their DJs used to play sets at my junior high school for our dances. Just remembering that gives me flashbacks of CK One wafting in the air and seeing the popular girls white-girl dance to “Hoochie Mama” on the auditorium stage with WILD 94.9 bumper stickers adhered to the backside of their bell-bottom l.e.i jeans. (What skinny pants? And no cell phones here, honey. This was the mid/late 90s; Giga Pets, some quarters for the pay phone, and Bonne Bell Lip Smackers were in our pockets then!) I did the sticker on the butt thing one time in an attempt to be cool and ended up getting odd looks from my posse aka the geeks of my grade. Hey, I didn’t want to be a geek forever!

Weekend Jams

When my distressed soul needs to be uplifted, these are some of the songs I turn to…

This is not just a vogue-able, early 90s club classic. The lyrics can speak to what’s happening today: “…Follow me/Why don’t you follow me/To a place/Where we can be free/Come with me/Over there/Let’s put an end to racial hatred/And there’s love to share/Can you feel it/It’s in the air/Know its time for changes/Time for us to care…” Another coincidence: this jam dropped in 1992, which was also a tumultuous year, socially and politically. (Though I’d rather take living in ’92 than this year for many reasons.) 

I’m a sucker for strong vocals paired with a melody that takes me to dance paradise. I’m aware of the original version, but this was the first version I heard and it remains my favorite. The lyrics are equally inspiring. You have to be pulse-less if you can’t feel a thing when Martha heavenly belts, Nobody’s gonna take my pride, I won’t stop, I will not–be deniiiiiiied!” 

Who knew that Queen Aretha can also cut a dance track? It’s in the same vein as “Carry On”, with fierce vocals, stirring lyrics, and a fabulous dance beat, although I’m not sure which song came first. Ah, they’re both the tits. And this video will send you to flat-top heaven. 

Monday Jams

Nothing soothes my overworked ass (seriously, I had a busy AF past four days) than chilling with some mid-90s R&B jams to start my “weekend”. Some of the songs on my playlist right now…

Watching that “Bad Boys” movie started the craving for mid-90s R&B. (If you’re asking why was I watching that in the first place, I was in it simply for underrated 90s elegant rose petal Lisa Boyle, duh!) I was eleven years old when I first heard that song, and now I’m wondering where the fuck has the time gone and can we go back to the mid-90s when movie soundtracks, among other things, slapped?

The version of this song, the black pride in this video, and Janet’s look here is EVERYTHING.

I’d say I wouldn’t blame you if you don’t know who this girl group is. But if you proclaim to be a 90s R&B savant and you don’t know your SaDeuce, shame on you!! Give ’em a listen; they got some other bops besides this song.

Also, am I the only one who gets a kick out of seeing young women quickly break into song and dance when they see their man flirt with another chick?

I thought this song was the shizz back in ’95. Now? File this song under “Jams With A Slammin’ Beat But Oof Those Lyrics”. I didn’t know what they were singing about then, and now I don’t know why they sang about that in the first place! No wonder they were one-hit wonders! If their man had a side ho even just once, why be proud of taking his stupid cheating ass back?!?! Not even Danuel (I cannot stand the spelling of that name!) House’s soon-to-be ex-wife would stand for that.

Happy Weekend (And An Important Note!)

Before I get to the Happy Weekend part (which is never “happy” in my case because I usually work weekends, and there’s also a bloody heat wave going on in my area right now), an Important Note: after giving it much thought, “Sage Leone” shall no longer be. I do like to keep the name around (maybe for a character name), but I no longer want to use it as my pen name. Long live my original pen name! But I wanted to go by another nom de plume for a while. What that will be is something I’m still deciding on, although I do have another good pseudonym in mind. (No, it’s not Ivana Mandafuk–that was my old–and very short-lived–LiveJournal nickname.)

Because of the change, I’ll be altering the domain name in the next few days. (I’d change it now, but I also gotta come up with a good domain name to stick with.) I hope I can keep all my blog posts intact. If you also haven’t noticed, I did change the author “display name”. It’s obviously temporary, and I’ll do my best to resist the temptation to not change it when I’m feeling capricious.

For now, I shall leave you with a couple of underrated 90s rap jams for your weekend. I was going to post just the first song, but I never knew there was a soul version of that song until now. The messages of both songs are still relevant to this day and truly female-empowering. While I got no problem with some trash and crass in my music, sometimes the heart and ears need class to balance things out. (Especially nowadays!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kylie To The Rescue!

 

If you need some soothing eye (and ear and soul) balm after being ASSaulted by another unwanted serving of hackneyed hoochie heinies *cough*Cardi Blah and that other chick who seems to be no different than Cardi*cough*, just watch this video by thee Kylie herself and you’ll be healed! (And also craving glitter everything and your own gilded disco horse…or is it just me?) Praise be to Miss Minogue, and her return to alleviate us in these dreary AF times with her signature prescription of fun disco-pop and sparkly, colorful visuals that would make Lisa Frank jelly. Best of all, no fake asses in the video!

Listening To…(7/24)

No, not Taylor Swift’s latest album. (But go buy it anyway to piss off Gayfish.) Any of yous remember Princess Superstar? I first heard of her when I listened to the “Thinking XXX” soundtrack, about 12 years ago. She had a song on it that was so deliciously tawdry…

 

(By the way, this song is not the one I listened to on that soundtrack. I tried finding the actual version, which is remixed by Felix Da Housecat, but it’s not on YT! Boooooo!)

Anyone who happily sings about her coochie is my kind of pop tart! I’ve gotten into more of her songs since discovering her (very late, I should add). I stopped listening to them when I got on a 90s dance bender eight years ago that…is actually still happening. But I’ve been bumping jams from the 2000s lately, and her songs are on one of my 2000s-era playlists. Something about her music sends me back to that decade of Brangelina and celeb chicks papped without panties, before social media, wretched “influencers”, and ugly-ass frayed skinny pants.

 

 

 

She doesn’t sing about men who did her wrong and broken hearts, and she doesn’t need to. Her knack for being both kitschy and naughty is enduring.

PS has been in the music scene since the late 90s, but I haven’t heard a thing from her since 2008 when she released this club banger. To be fair, I don’t follow her, and maybe she’s been putting out stuff that I have no clue of.

I’ll always have this anthem of demureness and grace, however.

 

 

Why this song didn’t go triple-platinum and snatched all the Grammys when it was released remains one of the music industry’s biggest crimes!