And On Sunday I Laugh

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Highest payroll in the league and they had all the so-called “baseball experts” and national jokes, I mean, broadcasters rimming them out left and right, and all the Bums have to show for it is, well…nothing, actually. No NL West title (that’s the Giants’), no NL Pennant (that’s now the Braves’, and huge congrats to them!), and, most importantly, no World Series title (let alone appearance) this year. It bears repeating: no World Series title (let alone appearance) this year for the Dodgers. 

Best of luck to the throat doctors who will be taking care of the ESPN baseball heads and the TBS announcers after their endless deep-throating they’ve given the Bums (who also had some woman-beaters on their team) this year. You know those doctors deserve to get paid Dodger money while inspecting those windpipes that I’m sure will have remnants of Walker Buehler’s spooge and the tangerine-hued pubes of Justin Turner. You’re welcome for that visual. 

Finally, “grueling season”…*snorts* You mean a regular, 162-game season, Plaschke? A regular season where that team spent bajillions to acquire all the bats to catch up with the Giants and came up one game short of winning your division? A regular season that the Bums still have yet to fully win a ring in since–wait for it…….1988? A regular season that your orange-and-black rivals have won three times in back in the 2010s? So much for that greatest team ever in baseball history! 

And just like that, this mint in my mouth tastes even mintier. Mmm. 


Screenshot courtesy of LA Times homepage